Saturday, November 16, 2013

July peanuts

  • "Isaac, quit scratching your butt with your fork."
  • Rachel: "Are you wearing underwear, son?" Matthew: "Yes." Rachel: "I was talking to Isaac. I *hope* wearing underwear goes without saying for you."
  • Corinna's phobias: Dogs. Strangers. Changing tables.
  • Two weeks ago, as we left for the airport, Rachel asked Christine to take anything out of the fridge that she wasn't going to eat before we got back. We got back tonight. On the counter are half a dozen tupperware containers whose contents are in various stages of decomposition. Even over the fumes of the new clearcoat on the cupboards, the smell when they are opened is overpowering. Moral: Ellises are literal-minded creatures.
  • Isaac peed in his pants this afternoon because he was too busy playing games to go to the bathroom. Then tonight Rachel was wondering why the bathroom smelled so strongly of poop just after she cleaned it. I happened to walk by Isaac and announced, "I found the problem." He was only wearing underwear, and the poop had soaked through, so I cleaned up everything he'd sat on while Rachel bathed him and cleaned out the underwear.
  • Rachel's new range has a setting above "High" labeled "Power Boil." This one goes to eleven...
  • Rachel: "Is someone on the internet wrong again?" Me: "No. Just replying to a friend." Rachel: "I just think it's funny when I hear you typing passionately." Me: "It's a mechanical keyboard! It *always* sounds passionate!"
  • Me: Est-ce que tue as faim, Isaac? Isaac: Yes! [Still working on getting him to reply in French] Corinna: I faim!

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