More peanuts

Odd how whenever I go to make one of these posts I either don't have enough to bother with, or I have too many.

• Post-church Sunday afternoon wiggles: "Matthew, I don't want you tying your sister up!"
  
• More wiggles: "Stop climbing up that wall with your rope; there are pictures hanging that I don't want you banging." 20 minutes later, I have to break up climbing the wall with piles of couch cushions. Yes, pictures were banged.
  
• Matthew is outside sharpening sticks, in case he runs out of sharp things to poke bad guys with. He gave one to Melissa, who showed it to me: "Matthew gave me a stick! It's pointy! It's cold. I'm going to make it a bed for it to get warm. I'm going to keep it in my room and take care of it; that will be its home. It's a girl stick, because that's what I want. I will give it a pink blanket."
  
• Matthew: "I can't find my stick. Where was the last time you saw it -- the one that I sharpened on both ends?" Me: "Downstairs, when you made me admire its pointedness." Matthew: "Well, what did I do with it after that?"
  
• Melissa's breakfast of champions: honey nut cheerios mixed with cocoa puffs.
  
• My co-worker's daughter, on learning to drive with her father: "It wasn't THAT big a deal. It's not like there was anyone on the sidewalk when I went over the curb." I'm really, really not looking forward to teaching Melissa to drive.
  
• Rachel signed Matthew up for a bank account; now he's getting junk mail. He is, of course, thrilled.
  
• Working at a BigCo has its upsides. I asked, "How do I send out these dozen t-shirts?" and was told, "Just give the addresses to Assistant X and she'll take care of it." That's pretty awesome.
  
• Matthew: "Why is 'buttocks' more polite to say than 'butt?'"
  
• I noticed Melissa squatting by her scooter. "Melissa! Do you need to go potty? Go!" Melissa stood up. "I don't need to! I already peed!" I didn't understand at first: "Go potty!" "I already peed!" and she pointed to the puddle on the sidewalk. Then I realized that she had, in fact, peed through her tights and onto the sidewalk, and I changed my command to, "Go change your clothes!"