December peanuts

• Rachel: "Melissa, your hair is crazy this morning. Were you wrestling with a walrus last night?" Melissa: "I don't want to talk about it."
• Me: "Isaac, come back and sit in your chair." Isaac [sits in his chair]: "I wan' sit nex to Baby." Me: "Corinna will eat your fries if you sit next to her." Isaac: "Okay." [moves next to his sister again]
• Isaac cut a cheerios box in half and took it around the house trick-or-treating. I gave him some candy from my desk.
• There are nine boys in the jiu jitsu class. And Melissa. (Discrimination is already at work. Dude at the drinks fridge to Matthew: "water bottles are one dollar." To Melissa: "water is free for kids, we don't want you getting dehydrated.")
• When Corinna has an extra good morning, I have to sweep the table before I sweep the floor. She has a lot of extra good mornings.
• Not only did our minivan not have a current insurance card, it didn't even have one from the right company. Fortunately I discovered this while at the service department trying to get a loaner while they fix the broken door-opening cable, and not after being pulled over by one of Texas's finest.
• Corinna stole into my office and started head banging to "White Room." 44 years after its release, if you're counting.
• Melissa on Guns n Roses: "I like it better without the singing."
• Isaac is making a Zombie Farm out of popsicle sticks. I have no idea where this idea comes from.
• Isaac is going around the house singing, "Corinna, Corinna... I wuv you so."
• The elementary school gym teacher helps arriving kids out of the car in the morning. Melissa was a bit sluggish today. Teacher: "Wow, you kids are real zombies this morning." Isaac: "I MAKE ZOMBIE FARM!"
• Wiping Isaac's butt. "I poop! Now I eat, get more poop!"
• Isaac woke up crying loudly enough to wake up his sister. Then Corinna woke up crying loudly enough to wake her brother. Then it was Isaac's turn again. Finally Corinna woke up for good at 5 and alternately moaned and yelled at us for hours, until she finally fell asleep on my lap at 9:30. Bonus points: all this in a hotel room.
• Me: "You know, it wouldn't be a bad idea to invest in some more womans' jeans." Christine: "I have two pairs of girls', and two pairs of guys'. I don't see the problem here."
• Isaac heard Grandma singing Pony Boy yesterday. He was singing it tonight as I got him ready for bed. At four you're really Big.
• Matthew: "Why are they called Swedish fish?" Melissa: "Because they're sweet!"
• Shipped some frozen Texas BBQ to NJ. Warmed it up yesterday for the 23 Ellises. Rachel did a professional job carving the brisket. Everyone had thirds and fourths. Then today [Dec 30] I made 41 breakfast tacos out of the leftovers (with egg and cheese, of course). It was glorious.
• Matthew finished the flight home from NJ by puking on his seat, himself, and his mother. Guess he still gets motion sick.